Thursday, April 3, 2014

Thoughts

There a few things that have been bothering me lately and I feel like I need to share them because it might help someone or just me.

I have had a few people say some things to me about my kids on more than one occasion at church. But let me give a little back story. Unfortunately I have to attend church by myself with the 2 boys because of Eric's work schedule. On top of that we also have to walk to church because we have been down to one car, and everyone knows we walk to church. It was stressful at first trying to get there on time but I honestly don't mind walking, I really enjoy it and plan on doing it once we get another car pretty soon.

Here are the two main comments of the many (and I mean many) that people have said to me or to the people behind me that bother the most...
  1. why are your kids so bad
  2. her kids are like that because she is a stay at home mom.

Ok, lets address the first one. Number one, never, and I mean never say that to a mom or to a dad for that matter. It is rude and you have no idea what's going on. Secondly, my kids are not bad. They are a typical whatever age they were at that time. Yes they may annoy you, just like your kids might annoy me sometimes but they are kids and I don't expect mine to be perfect during sacrament meeting when it is two against one, really come on. Thirdly, seriously just don't say that.

"Her kids are like that because she is a stay at home," really what does that even mean. People this is the one that bothers me the most. This was said by people sitting behind me at church, at least you could have whispered it. So what if my kids want to be with there mom and don't want to go to class or don't want to go to you. My kids love there mama and might even be mama boys right now. I still don't get that comment. Is being a stay at home mom not something to be commended for? I totally believe in the "Family Proclamation" and that it was divinely written. Our church leaders and Father in Heaven are fully aware of the attack on the family. I am grateful I am a stay at home and I hated it when I had to work in Wyoming and send Walker over to a friends house (she was fantastic, I do have to give here credit). There is no better job in the world than to be able to be at home with your kids and give them love and nurture they need. Also, going along with this I have also had people tell me to put Walker into daycare/childcare/preschool ( I don't know what to call it ). I have my own opinions about that as well but will keep them to myself so I don't offend anyone because things read can be taken out of context.

When most of the comments where being said to me I was really struggling with going to church because of all the stress that came with it. If it wasn't for some answered prayers I know I wouldn't be going every Sunday like I need to. I hate to admit that but it is true. I was already feeling like why am I even bothering to go and then to get rude comments on top of it was not helping. I don't think my testimony had been strengthen in pray so much until this happened. I am so grateful for my testimony in the gospel of Jesus Christ and that I am blessed to have a growing testimony of it.

There were/are some encouraging ladies and they do deserve credit and they have been given credit because I have told them that they were an answer to my prayers, because it came at the brink of my breaking point.

If you are experiencing something like this please don't give up. Put yourself out there a find a friend. The blessings that come from attending your church meetings out weighs the stress you are going through.

Lastly, it is hard to attend church without a spouse. Please give them encouraging words or offer to help. I was in a ward once where someone made a rude comment to a single mom who brought her two young kids with her and she never came back to church. Lets be loving, compassionate and encouraging.

***this is not a cry for help, we are doing great and I have a great support system***

(after some comments and e-mails I feel that I should add, that this stuff has pretty much already stopped and it's not going to stop me from going to church, It has happened some what recently but for some reason the past few days I just can't stop thinking about. I have a strong testimony in the gospel, Satan just tries to get you in your weakest moments, sorry dude you lost. :) Also after some of the e-mails I have received I am not the only one that has experienced this so please seek those out that need a friend, you might be the one to keep them coming. )

2 comments:

Ash said...

The bad apples at church are the adversary's favorite, seems like they have a lot of work to do for themselves.

Shanna said...

Thinking of you guys! I love reading your testimony and seeing that even in difficult times you can come out better! Hope more help and answered prayers come your way. Miss ya- Shanna